Vlad Mazek » Jokes

This kind of stuff makes me want to go back to school

Vlad — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 19:30:37 +0000

From BoingBoing.

Read the comments.

So wrong…

Vlad — Sun, 27 Jan 2008 21:03:58 +0000

Y..M..C…A……

It’s Friday, what are you IMing about?

Vlad — Fri, 30 Nov 2007 22:12:40 +0000

In case you wondered about Own Web Now discussions on Friday afternoons….

Proof of Evolution

Vlad — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 23:27:44 +0000

Ever wonder why the inbred midwestern hicks that never left their zip code are the most vocal when it comes to denying evolution?

They don’t see the proof of it walking around all the time like we do. Remember the Ying Yang Twins? 2 Live Crew? Well, sit down.

Ladies and gentlemen, I have found the missing link and his name is Soulja Boy.

The missing link: It’s yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

+1 Greeks

Vlad — Wed, 19 Sep 2007 05:36:23 +0000

Gotta love bad college essays:

Check out this one, guaranteed to make you laugh.

Now, ironically, this is not the worst essay I ever read. I can’t be specific on which one was the worst as the person has now tracked me down on a social network and I don’t want to hurt his/her feelings but after my TA-hood at UF and checking my buddies essays.. this doesn’t score very high on the shame scale. But it is hilarious! Enjoy.

My next development project: Facebook

Vlad — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 09:29:28 +0000

Chatting with one of my friends at the moment (whose identity is being obscured so s/he doesn’t lose his/her job tomorrow morning); mind you, it’s 5:30 AM our time and both have been up for quite some time and I think s/he just stumbled on a winning Facebook application:

Someone says:

one of the options when you confirm a friend is “we hooked up”

Someone says:

“we worked together” “we have a mutual friend” “we hooked up”

Someone says:

that’s just impressive

Someone says:

i want to know what the statistics on that are

Vlad Mazek says:

oh, I put fake shit there (NAMBLA members)

Someone says:

i want a job at facebook just to sell the contact information for the girls who check that box

SBSer I Be

Vlad — Tue, 31 Jul 2007 06:27:08 +0000

I get my IT advice from CPAs

I sell Vista Home on $259 Dell workstations

I configure POP3 connector as a redundancy feature

I have never heard of the MX record

My brother-in-law does odd jobs around my house for beer

-I am the face of SBS

The most sophisticated musical instrument you will ever pee on

Vlad — Tue, 19 Jun 2007 13:04:56 +0000

So there is a commercial on TV now (thanks for advertising it during the NBA finals, jerks) promoting the new pregnancy test (youtube, safe for work).

Below is a conceptual drawing of the new Microsoft Zune 2.0. Looks like a pregnancy test, doesn’t it? Wrap that into the existing Microsoft Zune marketing lingo of “squirting” music and.. well, disturbing.

So the marketing team that brought you marketing innovations such as squirting, step into the social and a shit brown zune loaded with porn.. is now providing a pregnancy strip lookalike.

Microsoft…. please…. fire the department and the marketing firm thats coming up with this stuff.

Web 2.0

Vlad — Mon, 18 Jun 2007 10:25:08 +0000

You’ve certainly heard of the Web 2.0 – the Internet where information is collectively built up of people sharing their expertise and working on the projects collaboratively. The emphasis is on the community, on how everyone can contribute a little to make something great. Excellent example of this effort is certainly the Wikipedia, largest online encyclopedia created almost entirely by the public knowledge.

Then there is digg.com of course, it’s retarded step-cousin, where community at large contributes links on whats important and interesting on the Internet, now! And, through comments, promotes opinions and ideas related to the topic. Through that process the posted material starts a discussion and brings it to a whole new level.

Knowing the Internet, it’s usually a whole new low level. Case and point, someone submitted a story titled No Sex Tonight? which in itself is quite funny and safe for work. However, the comments on the subject really expose the full potential of the community contributions.

This, my friends, is how you start a Monday off on the right foot.

Makes you wonder why they needed a sign

Vlad — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 07:28:20 +0000

Can’t make this stuff up. Local grocery store (Publix) had this in front of their Frosty Paws display. Mind you that not only is this made by Purina but also has a tagline saying “Nutritious Snacks Your Dog Will LOVE!”

I’d pay to see the person that caused this sign to be put up.